This is the place where burdens are laid down and broken hearts are mended. Trials and tribulations may come, but cries of jubilation ring throughout the building. She has never witnessed such a beautiful and frightening sight in all her life. The people sway to an unknown beat that only their hearts know to the rhythm to. Tears fall freely, without consequence, bashfulness, or judgment. It is consuming fire. It has seized every man, woman, and child; dope fined, philanderer, and miscreant. The outsider is apprehensive of her surroundings. She is envious of the crowd, because unlike them, she has not been given the sweet gift of release. She too wishes to be caught up in the rapture.
I am about 10 feet away from the outsider; she is a young woman of about 23 years old. She has a quiet confidence and a defiant nature. Her trendy designer outfit speaks out for her, “I have arrived, but I am just here to look cute.” I sense that she is uncomfortable with proximity, and has not had the privilege of being unconditionally loved.  Love that she did not beg for, love that did not turn away. I assume this because when the usher reaches out to engulf her in a motherly bear hug she looks away, and opts for a one armed hug with her body pulled away. Seemingly perturbed, she flashes a cool smile, regains her composure, and walks into the sanctuary. The air is thick and humid. The pastor states, that today is not a regular service, and he implores his congregation to allow God to have his way. The outsider is in shock and a chill resonates through her body. A perfectly arched eyebrow rises in a challenge as if to say, “not this girl, and not today.”  The prim and proper fashionista is gone; she has been replaced by an insolent 2-year old child. The outsider slumps in her chair and pokes out her lip. One by one, almost every member of the church walks up to the alter to give their testimony. Even the youth, who usually escape boredom in the cushiness of the mothers’ laps, give their testimony. The outsider twitches, in her seat, because the raw emotion is too much for her handle.
The pastor urges the congregation to, “Let go, and let God” his voice is strong and etched with pain. “Please” he cries, “Give it up to God”. I can see the outsider desperately wants to, but fear and pride are holding her back. Her eyes are brimming with tears that she will not allow to fall. There are people in the aisles dancing for joy. A 60 year old woman, with the agility of a 20- year old, runs around the church shouting praises to the Lord, and still the outsider refuses to let a single tear drop. It has hit everyone like a contagious disease. She stands there fighting it, but wanting so much to be a part of it. Church is over now the outsider makes a quick exit to her car.
Just when she’s about to leave, the same usher engulfs her in a bear hug. Again, the outsider tries to pull away, but before she can go any further,   he woman whispers into her ear. I do not what was said, but the outsider breaks down, tears falling freely, without consequence, bashfulness or judgment. She is caught up in the rapture.